i kissed sickness goodbye

today is an interesting day.  i am coming off of a rather stressful monday where i pretty much wanted to crawl in a hole; however, i must admit that my mood has changed quite a bit.  i am one who tends to bottle things up inside, and, while it appears that i am not affected by the frustrations of life, in reality i am only masking my feelings.  after a while the pressure just builds up and has to find a way out.

anyone who knows me well is aware that i am victim to some weird health issues.  i went to the doctor today and as i was going back to work, i thought about how much stress plays a role in my health.  in so many ways, i tend to make myself sick.  that is so ridiculous!  why would anyone put themselves in that situation?  i do not have an answer to that.  all i know is that i want to do better.  we all could use a reminder from time to time telling us to step back and realize that we cannot be in control of every situation.  we cannot control people and the way that they treat us.  the attempt to do so will lead to nothing but failure.  i am only in charge of clay.

i  know that this is so very elementary, but i see we as humans forgetting these simple principles each and every day.  i am tired of being pushed around by my surroundings.  i want to be rooted in something more solid.  i want to be mature and not allow myself to be pulled down by things that do not even matter in the end.  i am a blessed man who has an amazing wife and a pretty awesome dog.  i get to do ministry each and every day.  those are the things that i should be focused on.  i want people to see me and know that i have joy.  and, when they ask me what is different, i can confidently tell them that i kissed sickness goodbye.