send us to the looney bin

"in moments of reflection, we often find that describing ourselves as normal is a convenient way of fueling our denial.  we are all weird."

i am the first to admit that i definitely have quirks; however, i often have to take a few moments to step outside myself and observe before i am able to grasp the depth of my uniqueness.  in all honesty, i am pretty strange.  some of the things that i do have become so habitual that i forget they are probably not socially acceptable and/or strange.  below, i will list some of my own unusual habits that have been brought to my attention by...me:

1. raw noodles - apparently i like to eat noodles raw.  something about the crunch and the taste is very satisfying to me.  for the past four months there has been a package of spaghetti noodles sitting in our pantry.  one day, i found myself opening the package and taking out 2 or 3 noodles.  i slowly devoured them and went on my way.  before i knew it, this had become a routine.  each day i would retrieve a small portion of the spaghetti and eat it.  about three weeks ago i realized that all the spaghetti was gone.  i had eaten the entire package raw.  it was not until then that i thought to myself, "something tells me that most people do not do this."

2. sing out! - for some reason, talking to people in the traditional manner can often get a little boring and mundane.  why not sing the words that you say to people?  it works for me.  people have told me in the past that i sing what i say.  it used to be just words, but now it is whole phrases.  most of the time i do not even realize that i do it.

3. mr. frog, please meet the human pretzel - i have always been a very flexible guy.  i mean, i can jumprope with my arms, put both my legs behind my head, etc.  due to the gumbiesque nature of my body i tend to sit and stand in weird ways.  for example, when i get bored and am waiting for a long time i often squat down in a frog position (i must point out that i do not do this to be strange.  it is simply a comfortable position.  i am only aware that it is happening once someone yells out, "why are you sitting like a frog?!?").  Also, when i sit and read and/or watch television my legs resemble a pretzel.  it is so natural that i do not even know i am doing it.

4. butter first - popcorn must be eaten in a pattern.  the order is determined by the amount of butter on each piece.  the most buttered piece of popcorn is the first to go.  the others follow in a pattern of decreasing butterness (not a word).  now, this habit may be confusing.  you may ask, "why not save the best for last?"  the truth is that with the truly buttered pieces having already been ingested, the remaining ones appear to be more buttered than they really are.  it is all a deception game, and i fall for it every time.

5. they are not living.  why are you talking to them? - i have the habit of naming inanimate objects (computers, desks, clothes, books, etc.).  i guess that is not too unusual.  only creative, right?  well, i also take it a step further.  sometimes i even talk to them (not whole conversations.  just a simple "whatsup?" to let them know that i acknowledge their presence).  please don't think i'm too crazy for this one.

i will stop there.  i guess this post is a simple way of coming to grips with the truth that some things we do on a regular basis may seem normal to us but if viewed by another person would be reason to send us to the looney bin.